


After The End

by TheTaxidermyPlatypus



Category: Sam & Max
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-28
Updated: 2018-04-28
Packaged: 2019-04-28 21:24:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14458050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTaxidermyPlatypus/pseuds/TheTaxidermyPlatypus
Summary: Cute Sam and Max oneshot, happy ending.





	After The End

Life just hasn't been the same since Max died. Sam winced at the thought. Died, he hated that word. No, max didn't die. Max was lying on the couch, lazily flipping through a magazine. His ears were twitching, expecting the phone to ring any moment now, just like always. But something was different now. Undeniably different. He didn't like the way his little buddy sometimes would look at him, his eyes full of a foreign pity that hadn't been there before. 

“Can you stop that, you're going to give me an aneurysm.” Max shot from his spot on the couch, never taking his eyes off the magazine. Sam hadn't realized he had been bouncing a tennis ball off the wall, lost in thought. “Oh yeah, sorry.” He tossed the ball into a corner of the messy room, rolling his eyes at Max's irritability. At least that remained the same. “Jesus christ I would kill for a nuclear invasion, supernatural demon gerbils from the past, SOMETHING. If I have to read one more page of this sports illustrated bullshit im going to put a bullet in my brain.” He threw the magazine angrily at the wall. “Max, you're just looking at the pictures.” “I know that.”   
Suddenly, the sharp tone of their office phone cut through the air. Sam made eye contact with his partner, as they both slowly stood from their seats, before bolting at full speed for the phone. Sam, having the advantage of being 4 feet taller, made it there first, as usual. “Uh huh, yeah? Really? No… Yes. Hmmm… 14. Blue. Sassafras. We’ll be there.” Sam slammed the phone back onto its hook, a goofy smile crossing his face. “Oooh sam it was the commissioner wasn't it? How many victims? Should I bring my camera?” He was practically vibrating with excitement. “No little buddy, that was Sybil. Apparently, Abe has gotten over his, ‘Max is a vicious monster who needs to be destroyed for the good of the earth’ phase, and we can finally visit!” Max huffed his breath. “Really, are you really going to make me go?” “Why Max, don't you want to see what their nasty human statue hybrid baby looks like?” Max’s ears perked. “Oh boy, What if its a disgusting human lower half, with a gargoyle on top, that spits brimstone and hellfire!” “We can only hope little buddy.”

“Jesus christ this place is prepped for the apocalypse!” Max kicked angrily at a baby gate guarding the entrance to the shop. Sybil waved from inside, a bundle in her arms. “Oh no sam, I don't see any disgusting fire vomit,and sybill looks almost entirely unphased, this isn't good.” Sam lifted max over the baby gate, before delicately stepping over it himself. Everything inside the shop was covered in rubber or plastic. Sybil had really gone nuts with the baby proofing. “Hey guys!” Sybil put the bundle she had been holding into a crib by her desk. “LEMME SEE IT LEMME SEE IT!” Max clamored over the edge of the crib, straining to see this supposed monstrosity. Sam easily looked over him. “Holy sweet strawberry jelly on triangle toast Sybil!” Sam jumped back at the sight of what seemed to be a strangely shaped lump of stone with googly eyes. “What? Is something wrong with him?” Sybil rushed to their side, picking up her… child. “How in gods name do you know it's male, it's just a…” Sam slapped a hand over max’s mouth. “Don't be rude max, he’s... Quite the personality i'm sure.” Max wriggled out of sams grasp. “It's a rock sybil.” Sybil furrowed her eyebrows, obviously offended. “Have you never seen a baby before Max? He's just perfect.” Sam shot his partner a look, that plainly said, ‘play along’. Max signed, discontent with the missed opportunity to poke fun at the expense of others. “You know what Sybil, in this light, he's not so bad.” Sam nodded in agreeance, relieved at his friend’s rare compliance. 

“So, do you want to hold him?” Sam stiffened a little, he certainly didn't. But before he could protest, the… ‘baby’, was being shoved into his arms and sybil was cooing over him like a mother hen. “Oh support his head, oh be careful, Sam…” Max was tapping his foot, impatient, and Sam could tell he was about to snap and say something stupid. “Aw, there you go Sam, look at that.” Sybil took a step back, finally. Sam felt terribly awkward. How exactly is someone supposed to handle a rock with googly eyes presented as a human child. He was sort of cute though. 

“Well gee whiz Sam why don't you just get a kid of your own?!” Max was now wandering the room. “Because there is no way we are ever babysitting that thing.” “Oh Max…” Sybil was now working at her desk, typing furiously into a computer. “Whatcha workin on now Sybil?” Sam was now wandering aimlessly as well, admiring random pictures on the wall. Sybil and Abe on their first date. Geology notes? No, baby photos. Sybil and Abe on their honeymoon. He avoided that photo like the plague. He liked to block out anything having to do with the conception of the thing he was holding. Sybil responded, never looking up. “Well, i've started a highly interactive blog about the trials of parenting.” Max dropped a heavy book onto the ground in surprise. “Oh no Sybil, no you're not one of those.” Sybil snapped a photo of a dazed sam with no warning. “The girls are going to LOVE this.” Max fell dramatically at Sybils feet. “NO, WE’RE LOSING HER SAM, THE WORLD OF MOMMY BLOGGING WILL EAT HER ALIVE.” Sam shook his head. “You crack me up little buddy.” Sybil rolled her eyes. “Quit the theatics Max, you'll understand one day when you have kids.” Max leaned on her desk. “I'll have you know I raised my very own child in our basement for 9 years.” “Oh the geek doesn't count.” Max gasped. “Well I never, Sam lets go!” He walked for the door, but was stopped easily by his friend. “That's rough Sybil.” Sam pushed Max back inside. “You never had to deal with diapers, or temper tantrums, REAL parenting involves a lot of bodily fluids.” Max's ears perked. “Those are my favorite type of fluids.”Sybil got up and took her hellspawn back from Sam. “The geek was much too self sufficient, but kudos to you guys anyways.” 

Sam, relieved to be rid of the literal weight on his chest, sighed, thinking of how lonely their basement had been since the Geek had packed up and went to college. He couldn't help but feel that Sybil was right. “Have you guys every thought of adopting a child, you know, legally and all that?” Max spit out some water Sam could of sworn he didn't have a moment ago. “Why would sam and I legally adopt a child… coworkers usually don't… wait Sybil… are you insinuating…” Sybil leaned back in her chair. “OH come on you guys, we all know what's going on, why not dive in headfirst. Sam shifted uncomfortably. He hated talking about this sort of thing. It made him feel queasy, like eating too many fudgy freezes, or getting kicked in the stomach. “For the last time, Sam and I are coworkers, jesus you people, there is nothing between us except brotherly friendship.” Sam sighed. He knew the drill, they had their moments in private, but Max would never admit anything to anyone. “Alright guys, whatever you say.”   
They left Sybils shop in awkward deadly silence. Walking around for a bit before deciding to go to stinky's for a bite to eat. Sam was getting tired of microwaveable hot dogs, and though Stinky's wasn't exactly delicate cuisine, it was something different. They sat down in a booth, ignoring the looks they got from the few patrons surrounding them. Sam wished someone would snap at him for loitering like they used to, but ever since the recent events, everyone had treated quite lightly around the freelance police. 

“Welcome to Stinky's what do you want?” Max immediately began ordering way too much food that he would inevitably make Sam pay for. Sam just nodded and smiled. After catching wind of some nasty smells from the kitchen, Max broke the silence. “Ah the smell of rotting vegetables and possibly bodies, I love this place.” Sam chuckled. “At least some things never change.” 

“So, Max, about what you said to Sybil,” Max huffed is breath. “C’mon Sam, don't take it to heart, but there is no way we could work. OK? We would ruin what we have. I’ll always be there for you, just not like that.” Sam sighed, casting his eyes downward. “Look, Sam, pal, we can have fun sometimes, maybe get too carried away, but we aren't crazy teens anymore. IT was fun while it lasted, but I'm not the relationship kind of guy. I love you, but let's not put a label on that. Deal? Please?” A concerned looking waitress gently set down their food, and speed walked away. “Fine, just, fine.” 

Once they had paid the check for their medicare meal, they headed back to the office. It was Max’s turn to pick a movie. He would pick something actiony, with lots of fighting, like he always did. Sam hung his coat and hat on the hanger by the door, as his partner ran for the couch, flopping down with a force disproportionate to his tiny size. “Oh Sam I know just the thing!” Sam sat down gingery next to him. “And what is that?” Max Leaned over the side of the couch, digging through their large, cluttered DVD drawer. He pulled out a particularly dusty case and blew it off. “THE TERMINATOR!” He loaded it into the DVD player, bouncing up and down with excitement. Sam knew he would be knocked out in record time, he was beat tired for some reason, and action movies always put him to sleep. He much preferred dramas and comedies. But it made Max happy, so he dealt. 

The last thing he remembered was Max yelling something about how cool a stunt was, before he nodded off. When he woke up, the credits were rolling, and Max was curled up in the crook of his leg. His feet kicked in his sleep. The TV was the only light in the room, it was dark outside now. “Jesus Max, what am I going to do with you?” He smiled, content with their current location for now. He monologue out loud to himself, he didn't worry about max waking up, he was a death like sleeper. “What am I supposed to do Max, just continue messing around for the rest of my life? I would love for you to be happy enough with me to tell people about us. I've always felt for you, and I've only ever gotten the cold shoulder, it feels like crap if i'm being honest.” He paused, petting his friend gently on the head. Max loved it when he did that, but told sam never to tell anyone. “I'd love to kiss you and not have you brush it off. I'd love to mean something to you. You don't understand that I can love you in more ways than one. You wouldn't have to ever stop being my best friend.” 

He was startled by Max stirring beside him. He prayed to god he hadn't woken up. “Sam?” Oh no. “Yeah little buddy?” Sam never felt nervous around Max. They shared everything with each other. Always. But this felt different. “Do you really feel that way?” Max sat up, propping his head on his hands, his elbows on Sam’s knees. “Well, yeah, of course, I…” He was cut off. Max collided with Sam with an almost inhuman force, wrapping his arms around Sams neck. It felt wonderful, and genuine. “I never knew Sam, god, I assumed you'd say I was stupid for feeling that way!” “Now why would I ever do that you bonehead?” “I dont know Sam, I don't know!” He leaned up and kissed his large associate, now lover, with a smile. “I say tomorrow, we go tell Sybil.” Sam was taken back by Max's sudden forwardness, but he didn't argue. “Sure, but she'll say I told you so.” “I dont care.” The TV flickered off and they were left in the quiet dark, enjoying a moment of genuine intimacy. 

Sam woke up the next morning, with Max still curled up on his chest, breathing softly. He smiled, confirming that everything that had happened was real and true. Things would never be the same, but he was ok with that. He was so, very ok with that,


End file.
